Break Bad Habits
Build Better Ones
Become Better Men
- Nate Whitson -
As a child of the 80's-90's, I remember very clearly when these wristbands first came out.
What would Jesus do?
It was such a simple and catchy idea, and I remember being surprised by how quickly it became a nationwide fad.
But I love this question and idea so much when it comes to helping Christian men change because it focuses clearly on a key component of it:
Identity.
By asking yourself this question, you're tapping into your identity as a follower of Jesus, and it helps steer the decisions you make and behaviors you take.
This is such an important way to create change that sticks. Yet, it's something that a lot of men miss when they're trying to change.
For example, let's say you have two men who struggle with lust, and they both say they want to change.
Man #1 says, "I'm trying hard to stop looking at porn."
Man #2 says, "I'm the kind of man who doesn't look at things like that."
Which of these two do you think is more likely to win that battle in the long run?
Man #2, for sure!
The reason that's true is because his identity is much stronger than the man who is simply trying to get results.
That's the key thing I want you to think about today.
Most men focus on the goals or results they want first.
"I want to stop looking at porn."
"I want to lose 15 pounds."
"I want to stop biting my fingernails."
But the key to change is to start with who you want to become.
"I'm a man of honor, discipline, strength, joy."
The true change that you desire isn't to start or stop certain behaviors, but to become the man God meant for you to be!
That's the intrinsic motivation that will propel you to true change that lasts.
So, if you want to become that kind of man, I suggest you borrow from the WWJD idea and ask this question instead (or as well):
"What would a _______________ man do?"
What would a man of honor do in this situation?
What would a man who loves his wife do?
What would a healthy man eat at this restaurant?
What would a disciplined man do?
The trick is to connect your desired behavioral change with who you want to become first, and see if that doesn't help you learn the trick to changing for good!
I think it will.
Nate
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P.S.
"But what if I don't feel like that kind of man yet?"
You don’t have to feel like a man of honor, discipline, or strength to start living like one.
You just need to cast one small vote today.
The actions come first — the identity follows.
Email me and request a copy of the Fight Club Prayer (that yellow document above), and I'll send it to you. Print a few off, put one in your Bible, and another somewhere else where you'll see it every day, and then rehearse it at least once a day.
Remember: who you become is a reflection of your daily habits.
